Old is I

Yes, that would be me.
That would be me in reading glasses.
Yes, I am indeed getting old.

I've actually had these glasses for a while. I used them as part of the outfit for the lawyer character when I made my "4 Hour Erection" video back in 2007. However, up until now, I never really used them on a regular basis. A few years ago I noticed that I was having a hard time reading the words printed on medicine labels ( There's really tiny print on those really tiny bottles of children's medicine ). I noticed I had to hold things further and further away in order to get things to come into proper focus. The print on the medicine bottles was so small, that when I moved the bottle far enough away to get it into focus, the print was far too small to see. So, I figured "Hey, my health insurance pays for it anyway - I might as well get some reading glasses".

When I saw the eye doctor, I found that my vision really wasn't so bad after all. I could read the 20/20 line on the chart across the room ( not a surprise, because I knew I wasn't nearsighted ), but I could also mange to read to the 20/20 line on a piece of paper held close to my face. However, I really had to struggle to read it. I had to stare at the paper for about 10 seconds before my eyes adjusted enough for me to read it ( I assume I was altering the shape of the lenses in my eyes to see it - so I could be looking at big-time eye strain if I did that all the time ). Even after straining to see the letters at close range, I still couldn't see them completely clearly. I was just able to make out the shape of the letters/numbers enough to figure out what they were. So, I figured that reading glasses could still help me a little ( I actually think you probably need 20/10 vision to read a lot of those medicine bottles ).

So I did get reading glasses, but they turned out to be a really weak prescription. When the doctor would cycle through different lenses and ask me "Which looks better, number 1 or number 2?", I could barely tell the difference. In fact, I could barely tell the difference between having lenses or no lenses at all, except that when I looked through the lenses, the black print looked a little a bit darker on the white paper. In other words, there was much better contrast between the black print and the white paper. So, I got the glasses, but I really only used them when I had to read REALLY fine print.

However, things have changed a little bit over the last few years. I still don't really need my glasses to read books ( and I have no trouble seeing anything on a computer monitor ), especially in bright light, but when I try to read something under conditions which are not so bright ( sometimes the light isn't too great on the trains ), I find that I have to strain my eyes a bit to read. So, I've decided to start using my reading glasses on the commuter trains. Today ( March 16th ) was the first day I tried this. It worked pretty well, but I felt a little weird not being able to see 100% clearly when I looked up from my book. It also felt weird to have something on the bridge of my nose. I dunno. I'm sure it's the best thing for my eyes, but it's going to take some getting used to.

Rich ( aka "Mr. Specs" )