First Date?

A week or so ago, I was reflecting on my early days of dating Ruth, and I was trying to decide when we went on our first date. Was it the day before we shared our first kiss, when she asked me out for dessert ( That may not have counted, because she brought her friend Amy along with her ( The first kiss story and the story of the dessert "date" can be found in this video. )), or was it the day after our first kiss when we went out to a movie ( Edward Scissorhands )? It's probably the latter of the two, which means Ruth and I actually kissed before we dated. This a probably a little less than typical, but it all had to do with the way our first kiss happened. Once again, I will encourage my blog readers ( who were pretty much all originally YT watchers ) to click the link above and visit my YT channel to get the full story, but for the sake of this blog post, I will give a little nugget from the story.

------ Nugget -------
Ruth and I met late at night to have a talk on the night we became a couple ( She had asked me to meet her near her place ). I actually thought she might be meeting me to reject me more firmly than she had done before, but instead she told me she had decided that she wanted to go out with me. Well, I was very happy to hear that, but we were outside in a public place ( not many people around that time of night - but still public ), so as much as I might have wanted to kiss her, I didn't do anything at the time. Anyway, I figured our first date ( which I knew would happen soon enough ) would be the appropriate time to have a romantic first kiss. So, after she gave me the good news, I told her how happy I was, and we started to walk back to her dorm building. When we got to the door of the building, I told her I couldn't wait to see her again and said goodnight. It was then that she looked me square in the eye and said "Aren't you going to kiss me?". Well, we were still in a kinda public place at that point, so went inside her dorm building, found a nice deserted room, and that's where we had our first kiss.
---- End of nugget ----

Anyway, the little nugget above actually has nothing to do with the main point of this blog post, but I just love to tell that story. :)

The main point of this blog post has to do with my first date. When I started to think about it a little bit more, I realized that my first date might not have been with Ruth. It have have happened a few months earlier. It may have happened during my time in Texas ( Yes the same time in Texas when I got my finger caught in a steel door and got thrown in jail. ). I'm not actually sure if it was a date, but ...

... but I'll let my wonderful readers decide.

Her name was Lisa. I don't usually use real names here, but I'm never going to see her again, I don't know anybody who knows her, and I don't think I've even told any of my IRL ( BTW - To answer a question from a recent blog comment: IRL = in real life ) friends about her before, so I might as well just use her real name ( It's a lot easier than using "The girl I met while doing an Engineering Internship in Texas" = TGIMWDAEIIT ).

Lisa was another Engineering Intern at the company I worked at from Sept 1990 to Dec 1990. I had just gotten over my fixation with College Girl #1 in August of 1990, and I didn't meet Ruth until February of 1991, so the last few months of 1990 was kinda a period of transition for me.
I didn't actually meet Lisa until rather late into my stay in Texas ( she was from a different school and was working with a different group ( she was a Chemical Engineer, while I was a Mechanical Engineer ) , but soon after I did, I decided it might be interesting to ask her out on a date.

Why? Well, I'm sure a large part of it had to do with the fact that Lisa was the first girl my age I'd really met after getting over CG#1 ( I'd also recently gotten out of jail. Yes, it was only 14 hours of jail time, but you know what they say about guys and jail. JK - I probably had more of a chance to meet women in jail than I did as a free man in those days ). Lisa was also undeniably attractive. Actually, when I think about it, out of all the girls that I dated ( just Ruth ), fell for, or tried to date in my life, Lisa was probably the girl who the average American male would find the most attractive. I say that because Lisa was tall ( about 5 feet, 9 inches tall ), blonde, and had big boobs.

However, while I recognized Lisa was attractive, the tall/blonde/big_boobed type of girl has never really been my type in the physical sense. I'm not saying this to appear un-shallow, it's just the way it is. It's not that I necessarily find height or big boobs to be unattractive qualities in a woman, it's just that when you discover at an early age that your are primarily attracted to women of Asian descent ( I discovered this at the age of 4, when I first saw Bernadette Yao on the TV show ZOOM ), you quickly become conditioned to not care about height or boob-size when deciding whether or not a woman is physically attractive.

Yes, so it was wasn't as if I was un-shallow or not horny - it was just that was horny about different things than most guys. Boobs never did it for me. For me, it was always legs that made me horny. And I'm not talking about the long type of legs epitomized by the famous World War II pinup photo of Betty Grable, but rather the short and shapely kind a legs that a lot of Asian women have. Back in my High School days, I'm sure my grades were a little bit worse in the warmer months, because instead of staring at the blackboard, I often found myself staring at calves of girls who were sitting in front of me.

I mention everything above just to make it clear that I am the typical honry guy with "impure thoughts" ( as they like to say in Catholic religious instruction ), but that Lisa wasn't the type of girl who would typically make me very horny. She would probably get most guys really horny, but not me ( This fact comes into play later in the story ). Still, she was attractrive, she was the only girl I knew within a 1000 miles radius, and I very much wanted to "move on" from my fixation with CG#1. So, soon after meeting Lisa, I decided to ask her out.

I called Lisa up and asked her whether she would like to go out for dinner one night. She told me that she thought it might be more fun if we took a trip together to San Antonio ( We were in Houston, Texas. San Antonio was about a 3-hour drive away ). She even offered to pick me up in her car. Well, as the old saying goes, "Beggars can't be choosers", so I agreed to this "date" on her terms.

There's really not much to say about the "date". She picked me up early on a Saturday and we drove to San Antonio. We saw The Alamo, we saw the River Walk, we had lunch and dinner together, and then we drove back. Nothing really interesting to report about most of the trip. The interesting part of the trip happened at the very end.

When we got close to my place, she started talking about how tired she was and how she really needed some coffee ( or some drink with caffeine in it ) before she drove back to her place ( I lived on the west side of Houston ( the side closer to San Antonio ) and she lived on the east side ).

Now, I know what a lot of guys reading this ( OK, I actually think only two males ever read this blog - If there are any more of you out there - please comment to let me know! ) might be thinking ...

"Hmm! Sounds like she wanted to come over to your place for 'some coffee' and the end of your 'date'. Could she have been implying something else?"

Well, I must admit that the thought did cross my mind briefly, but I wasn't really after "something else". I'm not really that type of guy ( though I sometimes wonder if I would have been so noble if Lisa had been a cute 5' 2'' Asian girl with nice legs ). So, I took what Lisa said completely at face value. I told her that I didn't have any coffee at my place, but that I could get her a soda for the road.

So, I really didn't really invite her in. Perhaps it may may been the polite thing to do, but it also kinda felt like it might have been a sleazy thing to do, so I certainly didn't invite her in to stay a while. I don't exactly remember, but I think she may have followed me into the apartment briefly when I got the soda ( It was a first-floor apartment, and the door to the my apartment was right next to the parking space she was parked in ). She may have even started drinking the soda in my apartment, but I certainly didn't give her the impression that she should stay a while. In any case, pretty soon she was back in her car ( I honestly don't remember if she got out of the car when I got the soda ), and the "date" had come to an end.

So that was that. Seemed like a nice enough "date" to me, but I soon got the impression that Lisa wasn't particularly happy about the way the "date" went. She kinda ignored me and gave me the cold shoulder over the few weeks that followed ( after that, the internship was over, and I went back home ), which of course made me wonder about what might have been wrong with the "date" we had. I wondered if it was something I did on the "date", or if was something I didn't do. I thought was a perfect gentleman on our "date", but perhaps she didn't want me to be as much of a gentleman as I was. I dunno - I'm not trying to flatter myself or anything. I'm not trying to say that she wanted to "get with me", so to speak. However, a girl that looked like she did was probably used to getting more attention on a date than I gave her. Perhaps she was insulted that I didn't give her a little bit more of that kind of "attention". I dunno. For what it's worth, by the end of the "date" I didn't detect any of those IT ( see my last post if you don't know what I mean by IT ) attributes in her, and as I wrote earlier, she wasn't actually "my type".

So yeah, that's the whole story. I'm still not sure if that was my first date or not. I guess it was in a strictly technical sense. I did ask a girl out, and then spent almost an entire day alone with her. So I guess it was kinda a date, but it never really felt like one to me. In any case, it was a good first step in moving on after the 22-month obsession with CG#1. I was a little bit more ready to start my courtship of Ruth.

Rich